if i could speak to you once more, i don't know what i's say. perhaps i'd rather touch your hand and save my words and wait. i'd save my words for your family, save my words for mine, but don't think i won't tell the worlds about your time alive. i'm putting honey in my tea cuz that's what you'd have done for me. i'm not dead so i need a purpose cuz that's what you gave to me. i'm not down. i'm not indebted. i don't need any company. because when i close my eyes i see you staring back at me. your funeral was a mess. you'd laugh if you were there. your mama wore that white dress and your brother fell down the stairs. i helped him up of course. he banged his knee pretty bad. he looked at me just like you did and with a wink i told him it could be worse.